" You look at your reflection and you dislike what you see. You see flaws, regrets and no confidence. Part of you wants to be stronger. Craving your inner confidence to shine but you are scared. Is it wrong that you feel unhappy with the way you look? 

You never meant for the one you love to look at other girls. You just wish that he will constantly remind you how beautiful you look when you doll up and build up confidence in you for him. You did it so to make him feel that he is proud to have you. "

" Love isn't always perfect. Love has its beauty and its flaws. It pushes people to their limit, to see how much can one do for someone one truly loves. What is the definition of love? I have no answer. I thought I knew what love is and what I had was all I ever needed. I was wrong. What I had before wasn't the love I knew or wanted. It was perception of a lie for the social media. To display a beautiful affection of love behind those misery and pain.

I never meant to seek for love again. At a moment, I hate love. True love was history. But love have to come knocking on my door. What will the path lead me to? Future seems uncertain. As for now, the walls on my heart have to stay strong. Everyone is scared of a broken heart. "

We broke off. I was a bitch. I was stupid, I wasn't even thinking clearly. One mistake link to this big regret.

This blog is dead. Real dead. All well, there is no readers anyways and I shall just blabber my way through.

It is 2.53 am. My body clock is screwed by all these design works. Damn. It stinks. This holiday, I am going to work hard, draw hard and party hard! I have to lose all the weight I need to lose. No more stupid excuses. Well, I managed to lose quite alot of weight and I am proud of it BUT I have to lose more. I want to hit the 60 & below target. I know I know, it is not about the scale but somehow, it does play an important role. I may be 63 kg but I feel much more heavier. I want to be toned up and ready to kick-ass in hot dresses. Yes, I want to be look good, feel good and be proud of who I am.

Sometimes, it just stinks when people shoot you and said that you are never good enough. Bloody hell. It is a way of motivation for me. I hate it when people say I am never good in this or that. I will prove them wrong. This holiday will be a change. I am going to groom myself with skills of sewing. I need that BAD. Life is always about learning, it is never too late. I am never good at some thing, I am just an ordinary girl who is trying to do something with her life. My life is hell boring. Though I have an awesome boyfriend by my side, my life is just plain boring and I doubt it will be anymore exciting. However, I am happy with what I have. I am glad that I have my family, my boyfriend and my awesome mates.

Guess what? I have been praying a lot lately. I guess my dad's book for my 17th birthday works well. Think positive. Well, at least I am trying to make a change to myself.

I am digging this look.