It is never an easy goodbye

Ending a relationship is never easy. 3 months or 3 years, having to say goodbye is the hardest part. I loved him the way he was. I loved how he pampered me with love and care. That he gave me his all in many ways. I loved him and therefore, I had said my goodbye.

We were two different person that can't work no matter how hard we tried. I am a girl with a dream, a person with responsibility in her job and her family and a girl who wants to fly whereas, he is an only child who had me as his everything. It was something I could not give him; my everything. Sadly, I have to face the reality and let him have someone who can do that for him.

It is never to say goodbye. This time, it is even harder but I have to make a right choice for two person's happiness.


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I wish I know the right words to say to someone I love. That someone I love ignore me completely & I can't help but think maybe he is better off without me. I called & he rejected my calls. I texted & he never reply. 

He will never reply me & I don't blame him. If someone out there listens to him better than I do, that person deserve him. It is not I don't want to listen to him but ever since I work in this company, I can't concentrate on him as much as he do. Answering to clients, dealing with my boss & the other colleague & other workloads + my life, I am so carried away that I don't know how to balance everything.

And if I tell him that, he will reply me, " Okay. Then I will be like you. I won't put you as my first priority because you can't put me first. " I don't know if I know him completely but I know what he will reply when we quarrel. I let him rant to me about his NS stuff. I may not be the most understanding person/a person who knows about army life but I try to listen to him & take in as much as I know. Am I really bad? 

I don't want to keep complaining to him about my work stuff because it is not needed all the time. He don't even know what I do much at work because it is hard to explain to him/anyone. 

I wish I can type more here but I don't know what words to write on what I am feeling. I just want to get away from here; from life.