" It isn't about him changing. It is the mindset we had for a relationship that we were looking for. I wasn't the sort of girl he wants in a relationship. Love is in a form of different level. No matter how bad I want to make it to work, we will end up quarreling about the same issue. When you can't make a man happy, you feel useless. You want to give him your all but you want respect from a man. "

" Is this right? Part of me wants to hold on, part of me thinks it is better to let you go. Am I your happiness? Why do I feel like I am not anymore? You used to send me goodnight text on how much you love me and I told you to never stop cause I want to be reminded how lucky I am to have you.

 You said you want to let me go and I told you what it meant in my heart. You chose to say you will love me lesser. Do you know how it feels? It feels like thousand needles pierced through my heart. Why do you have to say you love me lesser? So those words you said to me in the past meant nothing? What am I to you? A toy? You can love me and yet, let me go bit by bit. 

God, please let this be a heavy storm that I can get through. "

Unplanned.

" Unplanned dates create special moments. 

 It wasn't the most perfect night when you wasn't feeling your best but being able to take care of you made me feel happy. I want to be able to take care of you when you are sick, tuck you into bed and keep you warm throughout the night. I want to be that person for you. 

 My actions may not show much but the fact is I do enjoy being with you. At the same time, I hope you will open up to me and show me the real you. Somehow, I feel that every smile you gave lies a pinch of sadness in your heart. "

" I stayed near you and be by your side, holding your hands and clearing your tears. 

But you didn't seem to do the same for me. "

I want to be your hero.

" I know you have been hurt before. People left you without any message or any reason. I know what it feels like cause I had people who left my life without any reason or message. I got hurt but I still wanna let people in. Some people are meant to leave. Not everyone will stay by your side till the end.

 However, I am the stubborn one. I want to stay by your side even how tough life can be with you. I enjoy every moment with you. When we quarrel, laugh, cry, it means a lot to me. I don't know what the future holds. I just know you are my best friend, my shopping partner, my design consultant, my quarreling partner and my caretaker. This is all the roles you took on when you came into life. 

 And now, I want to be your hero. " 

Idea of Love

" What's love? I grew up, thinking that love is the perfect solution to life. It was and still is the key to life. I never knew love has its loopholes. I can't teach what love really is. I just understood it. It taught me the flaws about itself. 

 Loving someone is a joy. Knowing someone that you love loves you is the greatest thing to be felt. It also taught me that the person you love can hurt you in many ways. That person has the key to your sadness and your happiness. That person can break you easily or bring you high up in the sky. That's the thing about love. We are drown in the fantasy of perfect happily ever after which it doesn't happen. That's why we get hurt easily. 

 To find perfect love may happen to maybe a possible one in a million. I envy those couples who met their true love in their first love. It is beautiful to see a old couple who loves each other like how they did when they were in their teens. I wonder if it will ever happen to me? Will it?

 I don't know if who is the right one for me or the guy I am seeing is the perfect soul-mate. I guess I will do what love taught me. Love isn't selfish, Love isn't about envy, Love is to care and shower one with what you can give. Just because a guy you thought was your forever hurts you, doesn't mean you should hate love. Learn from love, Grow from what it taught you. One day, just maybe I will be thankful to love. "